Saturday, January 7, 2012

A month later

Today my son is one month old... yes, he is not here by my side but that does not mean i have forgotten about him. He is still and forever will be in my memory. Don't get me wrong, i have accepted what the almighty has destined.

I pray not to have another child,but i pray that the almighty will give me what is best in this world and the hereafter. although the almighty knows that i have been longing to have my own child ever since i got married, i will keep on trying. now i have more faith in facing anything that i will never expect in life

When i look at this positively i have seen the 'hikmah'(blessings) on why this happened, im sure in the future i will thank Allah on the changes and the lessons i have learned.

Son,

The moment i knew i was pregnant was the best news i could ever ask for And when the time came for us to know your gender, your ayah was the happiest dad in the world. I guess he must have envisioned you to have a career path like him and your tok mi :).

Sometimes i wonder if i did anything wrong when i was pregnant to you..... But i think allah has planned this, at least i know how my son looks like... More like his ayah. I wonder what you are doing up there. Im sure you are in a better care. With free flow of food and drinks, better than your mom's cooking :)

Son, you will always be my first born, we bought some stuff for you but we will keep it for your adik insyallah . Allah knows best,!
Wait for me at the gates of heaven... it is every mother's wish to meet their child in heaven. (I know he can't read this, but i wish to express myself).

cherish every moment you have... you never know what the future holds - this statement has brought a whole new meaning for me.

8 comments:

sahida said...

Maya, kuatkan hati ya? Tak siapa kata menghadapi ni sesuatu yang mudah, tp yakinlah pada Dia. Allah tak akan menguji dgn sia- sia, InsyaAllah..

Maya said...

sahida,

thank you : )....

'Bertawakal lah kepada Allah, dan berikthiar lah dengan keupayaan sendiri'...

I'm holding on to this now and i have never felt better.

sahida said...

Maya,i've read ur entry tentang miscarriage tu. saya dah berkahwin 2 tahun++ dan masih belum pregnant. Saya tau apa rasanya menanti dan merasa diri boleh preggy/tak..

Betul.. kena terus berusaha dgn keupayaan sendiri dan bertawakal selepas berusaha..

Penantian begini mmg sesuatu yg menguji, tp yakinlah.insyaAllah ujian begini berbaloi.

Take care..^^

Nabilah said...

Assalamu alaikum Maya. For once, I am speechless.

I can only pretend to understand how difficult it must be to go through what you just did. But I do know, with absolute certainty that Allah knows your struggles. May Allah reward you bountifully inshallah.

“Indeed, the patient will be given their reward without account.” (Qur’an, 39:10)

My prayers are with you sis.

Unknown said...

maya..youre so strong! mashaallah..i know i am crying when kakdina shared with us..."allah wont test u what u can't bear" ..and it is true! may allah bless u and farez..amin..

MIE said...

Assalamualaikum
Maya...I just heard the news.
Semoga Maya and Family sabar ya...
Pray for our baby...insyallah due bulan April.

shera said...

Maya, just heard the news. Menitik juga air mata.

Sesungguhnya Allah tidak akan uji hambaNya melebihi kekuatan kita.

be strong coz I know u are.

xoxo,
shera

Maya said...

Thank you friends for your word of encouragement!

Hilmie!- insyallah i pray for a healthy baby for you and for everyone.